I know I'm being highly nonsensical by wasting my time blogging all day long, but I seriously am bored and had nothing to do yesterday. Dad's still not home...


I'm feeling extremely nostalgic right now. you want so much to go back to the past, feel like you belong to a school that made you you because of the culture and the people. you miss the teachers (who really go beyond limits to bless you); you miss the friends, the people who helped you grow, built you up, loved you, gave you hope, encouraged you; you miss having to focus and study and scold yourself for being 'too slow'. above all, I want to go back to when I seemed to have a faith that was child-like. There weren't any qualms to how much I believed God had a purpose for me, how much He loved me and how good a person I was, because I'm made righteous in Christ. somehow, things turned for the worse this year, and I was made to go under the knife's blade, to be sharpened, to deal with trouble (in which is found in the world, but He creates peace in trouble)...and simply put, a whirlpool of emotions, a state in which you really felt like you were dying and everything that made you you was being sucked out of you, you were turning into someone nobody could understand - not even yourself.
but as much as I miss these things, God is always in control. God will forever be God, and I'll let Him take the highest honour, have the greatest glory (and I'll never steal any) and be in the highest place.

today, I was led back to 'I offer my life'. it was for a period of time the song of my heart. I thank God we sang it during service today, cause I think this time round, I truly believe that my life has been made for His glory, and I know He'll use me as He wills. all glory and praise is His for whatever breakthroughs I've had, and like we always say, we don't go thru' good and bad circumstances for no reason, they only prepare us for the future, prepare us for more, prepare us for when we can help others who go thru' what we have. amen.

all that I am
all that I have
I lay them down
before You, O Lord
all my regrets
all my acclaims
the joy and the pain
I'm making them yours

things in the past
things yet unseen
wishes and dreams
that are yet to come true
all of my hopes
all of my plans
my heart and my hands
are lifted to You

Lord I offer my life to You
everything I've been through
use it for Your glory
Lord I offer my days to You
lifting my praise to You
as a pleasing sacrifice,
Lord I offer you my life

and I better mean what I sing, what I say, what I proclaim. :)