HOLIDAYS ARE HERE, FRIENDS.
do you roger that? :)

unbelievable much, half a year has zoomed by. it means there're only 6 (short) school terms to go before the A levels are here, marking the end of JC - which in every aspect is still as new a concept to me right now. the wound is raw, the wound of disappointment when I hadn't gotten more distinctions as I'd wanted to at the Os; it seems it was only yesterday I left MG. really really miss the people, the friends, the teachers, the environment. OKAY GET THIS RIGHT: I LOVED HOW WE ONLY HAD GIRLS AROUND, AWESOME MUCH.

really I'm sure many feel the same. having to leave a familiar place (ten years of methodist girls' school has rendered me helpless in the sea of boys and girls who come from really different backgrounds, having experienced very different school cultures - really, cannot emphasise this enough) and assimilate into this entirely foreign planet - we naturally put on a facet and try really hard to fit in. this hurts alot, sucks alot out of us. but it's the truth isn't it? maybe I've tried too hard; maybe I shouldn't even have cared because romans 12:2 was supposed to always be close to my heart and be that heartsong driving me on daily - it hasn't been. so perhaps the hols is really a good time for me to catch up with all the lost time with God, a good time for me to reflect on how unhappy a "kid" I've been, a good time to reflect on how I've expected too much from Him and not giving anything in return, a good time to deal with how God hasn't made me like other people I admire (albeit outwardly...:/).

I'd say entering rj and joining canoeing has changed me, alot. both for worse and for better. there're just some new issues that have surfaced to be dealed with, when underlying ones haven't exactly been sorted out (like that of healthy eating habits - yes, it sucks thinking every bit of food you eat is gonna make you fat). but serving in children's ministry & being part of YPM has also made me a very very happy person on weekends - which once again is good and bad. good because then I'm fully comfortable with who I am and immersing in His Holy presence; bad because we're not christians until we lead authentic lives christians should - that means an everyday thing, that means it's a lifestyle that is not independent of God at all.

think we should always bear in mind though, and be encouraged by, the fact that God never promised a calm passage in life, but a safe landing. and the knowledge of God surpassing all understanding gives us hope, hope that everyone innately yearns for but do not always grab hold of - either by choice or the lack of it. "but those who hope in the Lord will renew our strength. they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not be weary; they will walk and not be faint" (isaiah 40:31)

okay, mustmustmust study hard! doing badly for CTs would mean risking 15% of the chance of me actually being promoted to j2, hahaha. :) i do thank God for the rj system though - CTs having 15% weightage & promos having 85%; all other tests and assignments not bearing any - because I might just retain if we had to count on those day-to-day pieces of work especially since I'm a big fat procrastinator, and a professional one at that. :) alll the best to all having papers after the hols as well, we have the holidays to catch up and give our 101%!

highlights of the awesome holsss
31st may-1 june: lisa/syafiq/jingsheng's birthday party
2-4th: CAC!
5th: facing the giants movie screening during YPM (ANYONE INTERESTED TO COME? 5-730PM AT CHURCH OF SINGAPORE (MARINE PARADE), DROP ME A FB MESSAGE OR TEXT IF YOU'RE FREE :))
7-10th: COS annual bible camp with some of the girlfriends (jasmine, abi tay, nette, faith, kims, rachel?) & awesome 'family guys' (hopefully ben yeo's going) in malacca!

SIDENOTE: MISS TRAINING AND TEAMMATES V MUCH. >:( IS GROWING FAT BECAUSE OF THE LACK OF INTENSIVE-ENOUGH TRAININGS.